Getting older doesn’t mean you need to give up the clothing style you love. Many in the alternative clothing subcultures notice in their 30s that the attraction to alternative fashion wasn’t only a phase. But when you pass your 20s (and it’s already a decade since your teens), you start to feel pressure ever so slightly put on you to change your style somehow. The pressure can come from other people, but sometimes we create it ourselves. It’s normal to seek updates to your appearance. Actually, people usually feel an urge to change their personal style every 10 years. Yet, there are many ways to adjust the goth style to the turns of life in your 30s.
For me, the evolution of the personal style has been a rollercoaster. I fell in love with dark aesthetics when I was around 13 years old. Since that, I’ve been experimenting with different looks and styles. There were time periods of me wearing traditional and victorian gothic outfits almost daily. For some periods of time, I didn’t wear alternative styles at all and then suddenly transformed the whole wardrobe back to black.
The latest change happened when I was 28 and lost ten kilos (about 20lb) in six months. At that point, nothing in my wardrobe literally fit me anymore, and I got an opportunity to make modifications to my style. Since that, I’ve been on a learning curve with my preferences and new styles that I discovered. I wanted to retain dark aesthetics in my looks but at the same time felt overwhelmed by the inconveniences of a more traditional gothic style.
Adapting to the life stage of 30s
Circumstances change in your 30s, and it requires a bit of retouch to sustain goth style. We start facing new requirements and strict dress codes in business and work life. New responsibilities keep coming into our lives, and overall we’re busy. As a consequence of that, we start prioritizing our time, grow to appreciate effortlessness, and embrace comfort.
Many gorgeous goth ladies are rocking various dashing styles in their 30s, and there’s absolutely nothing wrong with that. I just started to feel that short skater skirts, revealing tops, straps, corsets, heels, heavy makeup, and dagger nails, as pleasing to the eye they are, make my life quite troublesome. That’s where I fell in love with a style called modern goth. This subgenre was an answer to all of my apparel issues. I got very inspired by the simple and casual outfits, which are also very easy and affordable to put together.
Essentials in modern goth aesthetics
Here are some of the essential features of the modern goth style I found working for me the best. Feel free to copy the ideas to refresh your casual goth in my 30s wardrobe. For more styling inspiration, follow my Pinterest board about modern goth outfits.
Very clean (well, modern) lines and cuts in the garments are ideal. Drapey, layered, and airy outfits are comfortable to wear. Close-fitting pieces work best when mixed with boxy or loose-fitting garments. There can be a hint of classic Korean style in the designs. The garments are not too exposing or complicated to get into. Multi-functionality and transformability are essential. For more comfort, look for stretchy materials and elastic waistbands.
Black is the natural choice to go with. Primarily, use mainstream clothes but all in black. You can mix various outfits of black mainstream garments and turn them into a more sophisticated gothic look with accessories. As a statement piece, you can try a dramatic one-color dress, bright red or white, as an example. Black is still 99% dominant with a very decent amount of prints and almost no bold patterns.
Since the garments are pretty mainstream, the goth element is in the details. Different kinds of mystical and ethereal symbols in the prints, accessories, and nail art are a good way to bring out your personal style. If you like prints and patterns, keep them quite modest. Put the focus of the outfit on one or two detailed pieces.
Tops have a more relaxed feel in them if you stick to relatively covering pieces without super sexy details or open cuts. If you want to add romantic and elegant sexiness, pay attention to the fabrics. Lace, satin, sheer fabrics are refined and feminine. Knits, sweaters, and cardigans are essential pieces.
Straight business pants, chinos, culottes, wide-leg pants, and black jeans are good pieces. Almost any type of black skirt can work. Essential style hack is wearing black tights with skirts and shorts. You can spice up the simple tights with fishnets on them.
Any simple shoes will work, especially flats. There’s no need to torture your feet with platforms and high heels. Think more of sneakers, Dr. Martens, boots, ballet flats, loafers, and sandals. Modest detailing with classy buckles and lacing are evergreen. If you prefer heels, look for stilettos, cone heels, and wedgies for more comfortable usability.
Hair and make-up
Hairstyles can be as effortless as the rest of the look. Classic haircuts work well because arduous hairdos and voluptuous locks are not predominant parts of a casual look. Darker shock hair color is a great option for those who want more gothy vibes.
Make-up follows the same rules of ease and effortlessness. Heavy eye make-up is not something necessary to wear daily. You will go far with a flawless foundation and natural contouring, classy eyelashes, liner, and neat eyebrows. For more drama, you can add dark lipstick. Think of solutions that save you time and effort, like permanent makeup and eyelashes.
The essential accessories are sunglasses, brim hats, and big pendants. Curb the flowy garments with a cinch belt. Bags can be almost anything as long as they are black and practical, so they’ll be timeless and serve your needs from one season to another. The number of accessories may not be extravagant, but single pieces can be flamboyant. A moderate and simple black outfit highlights the sole accessories and details.
For more inspiration for this style, don’t forget to click and follow my Pinterest board! I keep adding content to the board whenever I discover new outfit ideas.
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Hi, i didn’t know you since today, and i think you quite saved my life today. I am 27, mom of a 4 mth old sweet little boy, but i find myself fighting with PPD has i hardly try to reconnect with myself. It is like i lost myself, and the thing that made me ME. I still wear black, l still love the aesthetic, but i lost this bold part of me that was fkg piercing herself (i’m even afraid to play zombie game now…as a Resident Evil fan!). But i never thought about modern Goth for the 30s. Thanks to you i’ll give it a thought.
Hope the best for you !
Hi there! Thank you for your lovely feedback <3 Totally feel the "reinventing yourself" phase...
I hope you're doing well, too!
Best wishes, Mirka
Hope you are good too.
I’m back from th “dead” (if i can make the joke ha ha) with shaky confidence, 2 new tattoos and a better definition of myself).
I feel much better now. Sometimes it backs me up, but i keep fighting. I had to convince myself that i didn’t have to be a mom in the outfit and mind everytime. My son is a litteral little man now (13 months) and love having his tattooed and pièces funny mommy back !
To all of the people that’ll suffer this, get out of your house and stop focusing on silly thing that will hurt you for nothing. It’s hard, but you’ll need to just not give a fk about all this, as long as everybody’s healthy, just go out and have fun times !
You’ll rock this guys !
Just found your blog as I was desperately trying to find my goth style at now 29 not far from 30! It looks like your journey has been similar to mine. I started goth clothing at 13 and wore victorian clothing everyday until uni when it became too impractical. Then had a more sober look. Starting work full time and meeting up with people who weren’t into the same style as me, I feel like I have faded away for some time. There is no denying it is still part of me but it is a struggle to look mature and credible at work whilst embracing the darkness! Reading your suggestions has been a great help and I will definitely be taking this onboard. Here’s to staying true to who we are and embracing the 30s 😊
Best wishes and please keep sharing the great ideas!
PS: love the red lipstick!
Thank you so much for leaving such a kind and inspiring comment ❤️ Your support means a lot to me! I will try my best to get back to blogging 🙏🏻
Best regards, Mirka
Thanks for helping me find a way to get back to this style. Same here, I developed this love for dark aesthetics at a very young age (around 11 years old) and by the time I was 16 all I wore was corsets and tutu skirts. When I turned 21 I realised I spent 10 years of life dressing in black and I was concerned about not being able to stop doing it. I was going to start my first job and I didnt want to feel like I wasn’t “professional enough” or people thinking “she’s too old for wearing that” by the time I was 25. So I changed my style… like a lot, I moved to a classy and elegant style, which I’ve been told that even if I look good I’m too young to wear it lol. I also love this style, but at 29 at this point Im tired of feeling “too old” everytime I see someone younger with a goth style.
I’m immediately like “oh, they look like me! If only I was 10 years younger!”
I just wanted to say thank you for showing me an alternative style that doesn’t look like I refuse to accept my age. I saw your Pinterest board and there was one with a long dress that I was like “I love how it looks classy and goth!” Thanks for showing me that goths can be classy too at any age! <3
Hi Carolina! Thank you for the lovely comment and for sharing your story ❤️ I can relate 100% Goths can definitely be classy! – Mirka